A Day in the Life of MissingNo

By Rita Buuk

I woke up in the water. My pieces were bobbing in the waves. The surf must have carried all of me afloat during the night. I normally slept on the beach. I looked around at my pixels. No, oh no, my bottom corner was missing! I hated when I had to look for my pieces.

I stretched, and pulled myself together. My corner must be on the beach.

I started to glow, and I lifted into the air. I soared over the water back towards Cinnabar Island, my home.

I crashed onto the sand. Without feet or any appendages at all, it's tough to land. All my pixels scattered around. Another thing I don't like about myself: I fall apart too easily.

I pulled myself together again and I looked around for my corner. Ah, there it was! It was leaning up against the PokeCenter, and I walked over to get it. Without legs, I walk weird. I'm kind of like a swarm of bees with all my pixels floating around. And when I move, I'm not sure how. I just get there. I don't teleport or anything; I actually have to sort of walk. But not. I'm confusing. I wish I had an anatomy. Or at least some sort of solid body.

I went to reattach my corner, but there was an Elekid sitting next to it. I didn't see him before. That section of my eye must have floated away for a second. The Elekid set his bulky arm on top of my corner.

He spoke to me. When he talked, its voice crackled and zapped like the electricity inside himself. He was also a little raspy. Luckily, I am fluent in Static. He said, "You want this, glitch?"

My pixels bristled. Glitch. Scramble. Beta Pokemon. These names are so cruel. I'm just as good as the next Pokemon, and I don't need to be made fun of with these names! How would it like to be called a glitch?

"Yes, I do, baby Pokemon," I zapped back. The corner lifted of the ground and flew back into my mass.

"Hey, I wanted that!" the Elekid said, angry. He jumped for another one of my pixels, but I swarmed out of the way. Electricity zapped between his tongs on his head. "Give me the pixel, glitch."

I laughed at the Elekid. My laugh isn't too normal either. All my pieces zoom out and in and I sound just as electric as the Elekid's voice.

The Elekid gritted his teeth and growled. He zapped me with its electricity. It wasn't a particularly painful attack, but it got me angry.

I started glowing. "What would you do with one of my pieces anyway?" I asked it as I prepared to fly.

"I just want it. And prove to Magby that there ARE glitches."

Now I was really mad. I shot high up into the air. "Well, I am NOT a glitch!" I shouted down at it, and then I dive bombed him.

All my pixels blasted into the Elekid. "Hey! Ow! Stop!" he cried as I pulled myself together behind it. But I didn't feel to sorry for the bratty Pokemon. I then blasted him with water.

The Elekid started charging himself up again. I knew it wasn't too good to keep fighting it. First of all, someone could come of the PokeCenter any second and see me. Secondly, a wet Elekid is nothing to deal with if you have all of your pieces and your only other move is Sky Attack. But I didn't want to give him any satisfaction of beating me then. Glitches have a bad enough name anyway.

I dropped all of my pieces to the ground just as it released its charge. The electricity wouldn't hurt me there. But as its greedy little eyes watched my pixels scatter, he started chasing after my large, rolling middle piece.

Luckily, I was able to pull myself together before he grabbed it.

"I'd love to say and chat," I said sarcastically. "But I've got to be heading off now." And I was able to get away without any further injury or loss of a pixel.

I made it back to my home on the beach, but 'M' was there. He must wanted to visit. We are pretty good friends. "Hey there, 'No!" That is his nickname for me. "How are you?"

"Pretty good, 'M'. There's this one bratty Elekid hanging around though. He tried to steal one of my pixels."

'M' pulled his pieces closer together, as if scared the Elekid would show up and steal one. "Really? That's horrible! How would it like if I stole its leg?!"

"I know. We just don't get any respect. Glitches? Scrambles? What kind of names are those?"

"I understand how sensitive you are of that, but what else should they call us? We aren't like normal Pokemon. We're the only ones like this." 'M' spread out his pixels, kind of like how people shrug.

"I dunno, but they could at least try to think of something that sounds better,"

'M' and I talked for a while, but then he had to go. I was then left to my solitude once more.

I sat on the beach and swam a bit. Just as I was going to take a nap, I heard the tread of footsteps on the sand. Oh no. A trainer. I looked up. Actually, two trainers.

They were a boy and a girl. The girl had long red hair in a spiral. The boy had purple hair that was long for a boy. They also had a Meowth with them. The humans wore white and had black gloves and boots on. Their shirts with were marked with red symbol in the human language. I've never seen people in get-ups like that before.

They walked right up to me. I stood up. Well, I floated mid-air just above the ground. I looked them in the eye. "What do you want?" I snarled at them in Static, though, of course, I knew they couldn't understand.

The girl started shouting something at the cat. I wondered why. It wouldn't know much more English than I did. But I was wrong. It started talking back at her in her own language. Yet it had a strange hint of Pokemon language. Not Static. I couldn't put my finger on the exact dialect. I didn't have a finger anyway. But somehow, I could understand.

"It's what I was talking about. It's a Missingno.! The guy with the coffee wasn't joking! It wants to know what we want. And it doesn't seem very happy to see us."

"I'm not," I said, still slightly annoyed, to the Meowth. "I don't have much respect for humans or other Pokemon. What do you want?"

As the Meowth translated for the girl the boy reached out to touch me. It must have been wondering how I was suspended like that, my pixels swarming. I moved the pieces away from his gloved hand.

"No!" Meowth shouted at the boy. "It might zap you." The boy quickly pulled back his hand and spoke softly to the cat.

Zap him? I'm not electric. Not that I know of anyway. "What do you want?" I repeated the third time.

The Meowth looked back to me. "This is Jessie," he said, pointing to the girl. "And this is James." He pointed to the boy. "We are members of Team Rocket."

All this meant zilch to me. "And what do you want?!?" I nearly shouted at him. This was getting annoying. I wanted to take my nap.

"Well, we would like to capt-" Jessie cut him off and shouted at him again.

The Meowth nodded at the girl and said, "We were told you could duplicate items. Could you do that for us?"

What? Duplicate stuff? I've never done that. "Uh." I said.

The Meowth turned to James. "Get out some expensive item."

James pulled things out of his pocket. Two Pokeballs. A bit of string. A paper clip. Some lint. The sixth thing he pulled out was rose. Then he pulled out another rose. And another rose. And another rose. And another rose. And another rose. And another rose.

"Uh, James," Meowth said to him. "How many roses do you carry around?"

He whined.

"Only one? But James, you've already pulled out twenty!"

By the time he emptied his pocket there was a pile of at least one hundred roses. Jessie was jumping up and down with anger. Blushing, James handed her a dozen of them. She immediately calmed down.

Meowth turned to me. "Why did you have to clone the rose of all things?"

"I didn't do anything."

"Sure you didn't." The Meowth rolled his eyes.

James was saying something to the cat. "Alright," Meowth said to him. "You can catch it now."

Catch me?

Suddenly there was a Pokeball being thrown at me. I tried to move, but it hit my corner piece. That pixel was giving me grief today. I felt hot all over and all I could see was red. Then I felt like I was shrinking, smaller and smaller. When I could see again, I was inside the dark ball.

What would happen to me now? I had never been caught before. Neither had 'M' or any other Pokemon like us.

It was lonely and quiet in the darkness. Deprived of my nap, I leaned against the smooth wall and fell asleep.

I was awakened by the whole ball moving rapidly. Then it felt like it hit something hard, probably the ground. The ball bounced upwards again, and I banged my head against the ceiling. Then it opened up and I was nearly blinded by bright light. And I felt myself enlarging. As I made it back to normal size, the bright light died away. It was sunny. I was in the woods. In front of me were three trainers. Two boys and a girl. The one boy had black hair and a red hat and a blue jacket. The other boy had spiked brown hair, squinty eyes, and a green vest. The girl had orange hair, a yellow shirt, and the most annoying voice. She was talking then. On top of the one boy's hat was a Pikachu. "Huh?" it said towards me in Rodent-Static dialect.

I looked over my shoulder-I looked behind me, I don't have a shoulder-and there were those two humans and the Meowth that had caught me. "You'll need to fight them," the Meowth whispered to me. Then the weirdest thing happened. One second they were normal; the next they got block-like and pixilated. Then their bodies scrambled. Sure, I can do that, but I thought humans were solid.

I looked back at the other three humans. They looked just as stunned as I felt. I looked back at Team Rocket. They were like that for another second, and then they became normal again. Meowth put his paw to his head, aching. "The side effects of owning it." he explained to Jessie and James.

I turned back to the humans I was supposed to battle. The one with the hat had a puzzled look on his face. He held out a weird red gismo at me. It started to say something in human language, when a black lightning bolt shot from my body and zapped it. The kid dropped it and it lay on the ground, destroyed and smoking.

What happened? I didn't do that, did I?

The three of them mumbled to each other. Behind me the other two mumbled.

The Pikachu jumped down from the human's head and stood in front of me, cheeks charging. "What are you??" it asked.

"I'm a Missingno." I said.

The Pikachu stopped charging. "A what??"

I sighed. When I sigh is the reverse from when I laugh. My pixels move in, and then out. I don't make a sound. "You probably know me better as a glitch."

"I still don't know what you are," he said, charging up again. "But I got to fight you."

"Yeah, I'm supposed to fight you, too," I said, exasperated. I started to glow.

The Pikachu issued a Thundershock, but I moved out of the way. I heard Jessie shouting at me. I didn't know what she said, but I somehow understood the meaning. "Attack!"

I shot up in the air, and down again, connecting with the electric mouse. It swayed slightly from the hit. I wonder why. I didn't attack it too hard. I didn't want to fight it.

Behind me the humans were still yelling. "Fight!" "Attack!"

I pulled my pixels in tight, and I blasted out a Water Gun. The force knocked down the Pikachu, but it got back up again. Then, with all its might, it unleashed a Thunder Attack.

Next thing I knew, I was soaring through the air. But I wasn't doing Sky attack. The force of the electricity had thrown me into the air. Team Rocket, who were pixilated again, were soaring in the opposite direction. The last I saw of them was the twinkle of a pixelated star.

I landed heavily in a woods. My pieces scattered everywhere. I pulled myself together and got up.

I started glowing. I guessed I would have to fly back to Cinnabar Island.

Great. I hoped I got home in time to have dinner with 'M'.

What a strange day!

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